Monday, August 17, 2009
Things I want to hear
I'm waiting to hear the following . . .
From a GOP member: "Now people, cool it with the death threats and the stupid accusations of death panels and forced euthanasia. You're just proving we're all wingnuts! Some of us have an education, and some brains, and we need to discuss this matter like adults!"
From my kid's friend's parents: "Hey, how 'bout we split the driving? We drive one way and you drive the other?"
From Sarah Palin: "I must admit, I'm just really not qualified."
From our mortgage company: "We finally understand what you've been saying all along! We'll stand to keep thousands by renegotiating your loan!"
From my kids: "Mom, I'm really sorry I've been such a pill. How about I make dinner tonight?"
From my employer: "We've decided you are all valuable, and all this talk about layoffs will end right here, right now."
From my neighbor: "We're going to be keeping our yappy dogs inside more often, and definitely after 10pm. You need your sleep!"
From President Obama: "We freakin won! Enough of trying to appease these yahoos! We're going ahead with what's right and what's decent, and they can just sit on their thumbs and spin."
From Rupert Murdoch: "What have I done?"
From Dick Cheney: "I have a few things to get off my chest. Start the tape recorder."