My new hero

My Hero for today, and possibly the whole month, is our local dry cleaners DUFOURS! Two weeks ago, I spilled an entire cup of coffee down the front of my rather groovin' red spring coat. When you are a middle-aged Mom, you don't have many "nice" clothes left. But that red coat has been with me for almost 15 years, and it still looks fabulous - at my age you take your fabulous where you can get it! Anyway, I spilled the whole thing, with cream, right down the front.

But the story doesn't end there! Oh no, my stupidity lived on. I checked the label and it said machine wash was OK - so in it went, then into the dryer to air fluff. But upon opening the door HORRORS the inside of the dryer drum and my beautiful red coat are massively smeared with "Different Plum" Clinique lipstick! All over, dark purple, even the lining. I had left the #&^%$#^ thing in the pocket!

But DuFours Cleaners to the rescue! For a mere $16 they made my treasured coat lovely again. This may not sound like much to others, but I was so happy I almost leapt across the counter and kissed them! It was a good day.

Let's hear it for the mundane

It's been a weekend of the mundane, and that's OK. Piles of laundry means we have enough clothing. Stacks of dirty dishes means we have food. Dirty floors means we have a house. Beds to make means we have a warm place to sleep. I'm easily grateful and entertained by Life's little pleasures.

As I'm doing all these work-a-day chores I'm ruminating on my favorites and the ones I loathe. Here is my list. I want to hear from you. Where do you fall on this spectrum? Because it's Mundane March, that's why.
Holy Mackeral, could there be a more BORING POST in the history of blogging?



Chores that are like fingernails on a chalkboard to me:
Putting away clean dishes/emptying the dishwasher
Cleaning the frig
Cleaning bathrooms
Putting away groceries

Chores that are just meh, take-em or leave-em
Sweeping
Vacuuming
Dusting

Chores I actually don't mind, and border on liking
Washing dishes
Laundry
Raking
Baking and sometimes cooking
Cleaning the garage

Sure could have used THIS!

I found this ad in the Sunday paper - probably a KMart circular.
At first glance you might think it's actually a First AirZone trampoline as stated but no . . .
It's a HAPPY MOMMY SUMMER KIDDIE KORRAL!!!!

See how happy that Mommy is? It's because the new HAPPY MOMMY SUMMER KIDDIE KORRAL has solved all her "school's out" problems. Junior will wile away a fun-filled summer inside his protective enclosure. The SafT brand Mesh keeps him well ventilated and allows his skin to soak up all that Vitamin-D rich summer sunshine while Mom relaxes by the pool. On those beastly hot days, the HAPPY SUMMER MOMMY KIDDIE KORRAL can be moved into the shade, or placed conveniently near the lawn sprinkler, keeping your lawn and little one hydrated!

Just toss in the pb&j to keep those kiddos fed while they get their exercise on the trampoline mat. The exclusive soft covering also promotes long hours of napping. And the best part? The entire enclosure can be hosed down in under two minutes! It's so easy, you can get your teenagers to do it!

Comes with accessories such as THE HAPPY SUMMER KIDDIE KORRAL Hook-on water bottle, the KIDDIE KORRAL Toilet Tissue multi-roll dispenser, and the HAPPY SUMMER KIDDIE KORRAL mesh extension kit.

One good paying job

We're having big money trouble here, and my current part time job isn't exactly raking in the dough. But our kids still need a parent around after school and on weekends so they don't start doing heroin like every other kid in Northfield. (read the link, it's good, and no the kids in Northfield aren't on heroin!).

Anyway, I need a lucrative job that will allow me to be around when the kids are home but still cover all the bills. So I'm considering becoming a phone sex operator. I've got a lower register husky voice and I know lots of dirty words. But still I wonder . . . .

Hello?

Hey, I want some phone sex.

Hmmmm, ok, what are you wearing?

Nothing, I'm just sitting here talking to you.

WHAT? Are you sitting on the good furniture in your all-together? Don't you have any sense? Go get a towel or something!

Huh????

Never mind, so where were we? Oh yeah, you want to talk dirty to me?

Yeah, baby. Are you a hot b*&%h?

WHAT?? We do NOT use that word in my house!!! That is a woman-hating word and I won't stand for it, am I clear young man???

Hey! I'm not paying to hear my Mom! I just want some phone sex!

Right, sorry, so what do you want to hear?

Some moaning

Moooooaaaaaan! MOOOOOOAAAAAAANN! URGGGHHHH! ARGGHGHHHHG

Oh yeah that's good

No! It's not!! I just stubbed my toe on the vacuum cleaner. I told my husband a thousand times to put it away but NOOOO!

This is NOT going to get me off!

Isn't that just like a man? Everything has to be about YOUR PENIS doesn't it?

That's it! I'm hanging up!

Good! Now go do something useful like the laundry, and pick up your own dirty socks from now on. Moron!

This is my brother and I in our backyard in Marshalltown, Iowa probably 1964. We are wearing the coolest Gunsmoke sweatshirts. My Mom took lots of photos and had them developed as slides. And they still look good some 40 plus years later.

That is one lethal looking rake.