Let me hear your analogies!!!

I was reading some comments at DCup this morning, and read the quote below by Fran, and I thought it would make a good post. Let me hear YOUR best analogies regarding this financial mess on Wall Street, the bailout, and the blame game.

"It is all everyone else's fault. This is like being in therapy with someone with borderline personality disorder, only its the entire country that has it." . . . FranIam

"Like having to decide whether to let your house burn, or pay the Three Stooges $700 billion to try to put it out" . . . ME

See a great description of the bailout HERE.


OK, let's hear yours!!

Random Thoughts for a Sunday

1. This week, while walking across campus to a computer workshop, I walked by a bank of prairie plantings alive with the sound of crickets. Bliss.

2. Another chunk of bliss: the salad bar at work. Wish I had a stocked salad bar at home with all those luscious choices and someone to chop them up and clean the mess.

3. Wonder how much it would cost to refinance every American currently in foreclosure? Taxpayers giving to taxpayers – what a concept!

4. How many Wall Street moguls know how to operate a coin laundry? Or fill out a financial aid form? Or change their own oil? Or make a casserole? Or fix a zipper? Meh – they’re not so smart.

5. I’m not going to talk about she-who-will-not-be-named anymore, because what you resist, persists. I’m going to talk about Obama. I heard today that her running mate paid a Hollywood make-up artist over $5,000 for services before TV appearances. Talk about lipstick on a pig!

6. Liberals are just really, really great people.

7. Why is giving the people who paid the taxes some healthcare or other financial assistance “socialism” but a massive bail-out of the rich after they poop their pants is sound government policy?

8. One phenomena of the cell-phone age I don’t like? Teens who wait inside buildings and friend’s houses and won’t come out until you call them to let them know you are outside. Whatever happened to just watching out the window?

9. Ever feel like Fall is just slipping by too quickly? It’s so beautiful and I spend so much of it in a windowless office.

10. Damn groceries are expensive!

McCain's Brain

Go to youtube and see the first two episodes. Good stuff indeed, especially the first one. Thanks to Kirelimel for turning me on to these.

Hockey Moms Against Sarah Palin

Open memo to Barack Obama

Dear President Obama,
You had me at "change".
Please stop finding places to agree with that crusty old man. He's dangerous and I don't want him anywhere near the nuclear codes or the Commander in Chief role. You've proven you can find the common ground to build relationships and I respect you for that. But you need to demonstrate that you are nothing like that angry hawk and will bring intelligence and reason back to our country.

Separated at Birth

I never noticed this until just today. Keith Olberman is an older version of . . . . .




. . . . our blogging pal MG!!!!

Know who else was separated at birth? John McCain and the Crypt Keeper.

Discuss . . .

We had a speaker today who expressed something I've been thinking for years - I don't like the expression "people of color", I find it racist, and here's why.

I've been a musician most of my life, although you wouldn't know it lately but I digress. In music you have many pieces labeled as variations on a theme. You have the original theme, then composers will write their own interpretation of the original. But the original is always the THEME, the others are just VARIATIONS.

That's what I think about when I hear "people of color". Sounds like PEOPLE - meaning white folks, then PEOPLE OF COLOR - who are merely variations on the original theme. As though they are an alternative to the original "standard" idea. As though white people are O Holy Night, and everyone else is just some crazy interpretation of it by Mariah Carey.

White = the standard, Not White = alternatives to being white.

White = right, Not White = wrong, but we'll tolerate your craziness

Also, I'm "white" but I'm by no means colorless.

OBAMA SLAM DUNKS MCCAIN:

Talk about Obama!

Jobs I want to have

1. I want to be the actor in the infomercials that makes common household chores look like a week in a Turkish prison. I want to look all exasperated and blow my bangs off my forehead because these DISHES are just TOO HARD TO WASH BY HAND and therefore I MUST BUY the new DishieWashieGenieWizard! Then I will be immediately whisked off to a wonderland where my kitchen is clean, I have granite countertops, and my acne is gone.

2. I want to be the CEO of a major bank or corporation, run it straight into the ground in a blaze of destructive fire, then walk away with millions in bonus money.

3. I want to be paid by the government to NOT farm land.

Yep, that's what I want.

Picture Perfect Day

On beautiful Sunday, my youngest progeny and I went canoeing with our pal MG on Lake Calhoun, Cedar Lake, and Lake of the Isles. You wouldn't believe how much natural beauty there is to enjoy right in the heart of metro Minneapolis! The pic to the left shows an aerial view of the canoe rental landing - near the large red roofed pavillion. If you live in the area and haven't done this yet, go do it RIGHT NOW!!

The weather was picture perfect, and although MG squealed like a girl that we were certain to get swamped and therefore soaking wet, nothing of the sort happened. We put the 9-year-old in the middle where she enjoyed the ride while dragging her fingertips in the cool water. Afterward it was over to Sebastian Joe's for homemade ice cream. I showed how middle-age-'tarded I am by walking halfway across the parking lot in two different shoes - my water sandals and my "normal" sandals. I remember thinking that the sidewalks were certainly poured crooked on that side of town. Fun day.

Make sure everyone sees this

I had to laugh at this one.

NEW YORK (CNNMoney.com) -- President Bush and Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson on Friday outlined a series of far-reaching steps - likely to cost hundreds of billions of dollars - aimed at stemming a widening financial crisis that is roiling the financial markets and undermining confidence in the banking system. "We must act now to protect our nation's economic health from serious risk," Bush said at a White House press conference. "There will be ample opportunity to discuss the origins of this problems. Now is the time to solve it." "This is no time for partisanship," Bush added. "We need to move urgently needed legislation as quickly as possible without adding controversial provisions that could delay action."

Gentle Readers, do any of you believe for one single second that W knows even the slightest thing about global economics? I mean really, the slightest thing? The man probably has trouble understanding compound interest and how to balance a checkbook. I'm not being snarky here - this man can barely handle good grammar and we're supposed to believe that he's working on a comprehensive plan to shore up major financial institutions and the mortgage crisis? More likely he's enjoying a round of golf while his advisers and speech writers work up something for him to say to the press. Oh wait, I forgot, he gave up golf to show his support for the troops.

I find all of the current mess confusing and I've got about 20 IQ points on the man!

Alaska Women Reject Palin Rally - spread the word!

Of course the mainstream media is trying to keep THIS under wraps. Evidently over 1400 folks showed up for the biggest political rally ever in the history of the State of Alaska!!!! Did anyone see this mentioned on CNN? MSNBC? ABC? NBC? CBS? If not, they need to hear from all of us LOUD and CLEAR that we will no longer tolerate this ridiculous "liberal media" bs and that they had better get their act together.

Know what bloggers? You are the new Patriots. YOU are the ones having online meetings to discuss the truth about freedom and justice. YOU are the voice standing up to oppression and corruption. YOU are using your blog to spread the word about REAL democracy.

O-BA-MA!! O-BA-MA!! O-BA-MA!! O-BA-MA!! O-BA-MA!!

Sarah Palin is NOT like me

I'm hearing a lot of hogwash about Sarah Palin's popularity being based on the fact that "she's just like us". Get those pcs writing letters to the editor folks - we have to clear up this crazy misunderstanding.

America! Repeat after me:
I'm not wealthy
I don't wear $600 eyeglass frames.
I don't want to ban books.
I dont make rape victims pay for their assault
I don't fire people who don't agree with me
I don't fire people for supporting my opposition in an election
I don't lie, and lie, and lie, and lie
I don't favor pork and pet projects
I don't ditch my kids for my own ambitions
I don't force teenagers to get married
I don't parade my kids around for political gain
I don't support Alaskan plans to secede from the United States
I don't believe the Iraq war is a mission from God
I don't stay in my own home while charging the state for travel expenses
I don't mock community organizers, in fact I cherish them
I actually think the separation of church and state is a PRETTY GOOD IDEA! To quote Mrs. Palin "If it was good enough for the Founding Fathers, it's good enough for me!"
I know the Founding Fathers did NOT write the Pledge of Alligiance and they sure as hell didn't enter the phrase "under God".
I know that living across the Bering Strait from Russia doesn't give anyone foreign relations experience anymore than standing in a Jiffy Lube imparts automotive repair skills.

She is NOTHING LIKE THE AVERAGE AMERICAN!!! Pass it on!

Good post

A good post about community organizers by a friend of mine.

Great jokes that I didn't write

Stolen from here:

Conan O’Brien said: “Vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin has many views. She says she’s opposed to same-sex marriage. Did you know that? Yeah, Palin says everyone knows marriage isn’t for gay people; it’s for pregnant teenagers.”

Then Jay Leno weighed in with: “Well, it’s a very strange political campaign. I mean, out on the campaign trail, John McCain and Sarah Palin are talking about how they stood up to the Republican party, they fought the Republican establishment, and they battled Republicans. Their message: vote Republican.”

and then there’s Conan O’Brien again with:

“Sarah Palin has been getting briefed on what she needs to know to be John McCain’s vice president. The first thing they taught her was CPR.”

But the award must go to Jimmy Kimmel for this one:

“There are only 56 days until the election. I saw that they’re selling Sarah Palin action figures. Sad incident at Toys R Us today - a Sarah Palin doll shot My Little Pony.”

And stolen from Lloyd the carpenter in northeast Iowa:

Sarah Palin = right-wing hairball

I'm still here

Yes, folks, not to worry, I'm still here.
It's just been a wild week of full time work, busy kids, getting ready for a massive garage sale, and washing what seems like endless laundry. I swear my kids just put their piles of folded clean items right back down the chute. I'll post something interesting soon, I promise

Compare and Contrast

It's "New Student Week" here at the small academically elite college where I work. The freshman only are on campus, hosted by trained upperclassmen, with a full schedule of introductions, tours, small discussion groups, and parent activities.

This is such a stark contrast to the Big Ten experience I had at the University of Iowa. Let's chart them, shall we? This in no way is meant to criticize small liberal arts colleges - perhaps I'm just jealous? But it really struck me what a different atmosphere I encountered. We'll call my employer PC for "Private College".

At PC, you can back the family van right up to the dormitory door.
At Iowa, your parents dropped you off in the parking lot nearest your dorm. That was as close as you could get.

At PC, there are perky upperclassmen in matching t-shirts waiting at your dorm's door to greet you, sign you in, and walk you to your room. All under a colorful banner decorated by balloons.
At Iowa, there were cranky old women named Doris handing out room keys and she was usually housed in a dank office in the basement of your massive building.

At PC, you followed a wonderfully scripted schedule of activities to make you feel welcome.
At Iowa, the first thing scheduled was to learn your new roommate owned a bong the size of New Jersey.

At PC, there was a refreshment tent, a live band, and a free popcorn wagon.
At Iowa, new students are offered refreshments - they are two flights of stairs down, next to the laundry room in vending machines. And you'd better have correct change.

At PC, there was another group of upperclassmen in matching t-shirts wildly cheering each and every person, bike, and car that entered campus, all day.
At Iowa, the only thing around to "greet" you was the pushy Dad from Chicago who thought he and his kid owned the elevator and kept it locked on "open" while they unloaded Jr's crap.

At PC, the dining hall offers a daily variety of pizza bar, pasta bar, sandwich bar, salad bar, vegan bar, main dish bar, etc. Yesterday's main dish was Chicken Penne in Tarragon Cream.
At Iowa, you had two choices: take it or leave it. And the "salad bar" was iceberg lettuce, canned olives, and government cheese.

At PC, the home football game is attended by a handful of students who bring their books to study during time outs.
At Iowa, home football games were bigger than the RNC and with much less tear gas, but almost as many prostitutes and beer cans.

At PC, you can walk from one end of campus to the other in less than 5 minutes.
At Iowa, the occasional student would send up a flare so the search parties could find him.

At PC, there are funny little pranks and traditions that all students are in on, and all alumni remember.
At Iowa, pranks and traditions usually involve the FBI, local police, and the ATF

At PC, all the Seniors are the same age.
At Iowa, some seniors are creepy 47 year old guys who still wear backpacks and hang out too long in the Student Union arguing philosophy and government oppression.


GO HAWKEYES!!

This is not support

WASHINGTON (CNN) -- The rate of suicides among active duty soldiers is on pace to surpass both last year's numbers and the rate of suicide in the general U.S. population for the first time since the Vietnam war, according to U.S. Army officials.


Not exactly "supporting the troops" is it, Dubya??

Fall

While we aren't yet at the splendor of color pictured, Fall is fast descending on Minnesota. I could see my breath on the walk to work this morning! And in typical confused Minnesota fashion I wore a coat and sandals. The last day of summer vacation was about 89 degrees then WHAM the first day of school brought Fall.

I love Autumn for these reasons: apple pie, pot roast, incredible color, football, the World Series, my down comforter returns, walks in the Carleton Arb, hot coffee tastes great, frosty air, Halloween, and raking leaves among many others.

Fall will also be especially grand this year when we elect BARACK OBAMA!!!!

Where are my minions?

OK, folks. I thought my post on "scenes from the RNC" was some really funny shit. While watching the RNC all I could think about was orchs from the Lord of the Rings trilogy getting all excited to do some evil and bash some human heads. When I found those pics and posted my own captions, I was just cracking myself up I was so funny!!!! But only one comment? Come on! That's comedic genius! sigh . . . . . .

I just wet my pants

go here

Scenes from the RNC

Before his speech, John McCain kissed a few babies.








During John McCain's speech, the crowd was energized chanting "drill, war, drill, war, kill Russians, drill, war, drill!"


Did you all know he was a POW? Funny how he never mentions that.

What a creep

Not real presidential

I just can't watch

About 45 minutes from my living room, the Republicans are whooping it up over Sarah Palin's speech.

But I just can't watch - it's not good for my health. Either I'll urp up all over the sofa, or I'll have a stroke.

I actually pity the Republicans -they have no choice but to publicly fawn all over this horrendous woman. They all have to act like she's just the best thing since penicillin and not a wretched example of blowhard rhetoric gone insane and horribly, horribly wrong. And all that glorious praise seems a bit strained, doesn't it? I think some are a bit more than a little embarrassed. But what can they do? Criticize? In an election year? They would have preferred a straight-up white guy they can understand like Tim Pawlenty or Mitt Romney but instead got Caribou Barbie! (I totally stole that name from another blog, can't remember who, but you know who you are. )

Did you see the statistics that the RNC is "slightly less diverse than in the past". Only because Ray Charles died. Never underestimate the power of large groups of stupid white people.

I'm a soccer Mom, I've read some books, I'm a college graduate, I served on our community Park Board in a town of 19,000 thank-you-very-much, I have an IQ of 130, and my teens are NOT pregnant. Sign me up McCrusty! I'm ready to serve as VP!

Am I the only one?

Within one hour of arriving at work, I had spilled coffee on my new white shirt and realized I'd forgotten to put in earrings. I'm a loser.

Gotta weigh in on this . . .

So Sarah Palin's teenage daughter is 5 months pregnant and will marry the teenage father of her child. Well isn't that just lovely?! My thoughts . . .

1. We should leave them to deal with this matter in private? Absolutely yes. But in exchange I'd like Sarah Palin to get the hell out of my reproductive life and those of my daughters. Whether or not you carry a baby to term, put it in an adoptive home, abort, marry, become a single Mom, etc is just plain no one else's business. Turn around is fair play Mrs. Palin.

2. I'm still questioning whether Mrs. Palin's 4th baby is indeed her own, and not the child of her oldest daughter. Too many stinky questions and facts that just don't fit. Not that I really care, but lying has become all too easy for these conservatives.

3. So, how's that "abstinence only" sex education thing working out for them?

4. Sarah Palin is up to her neck in scandals and questionable behavior. She claims the Founding Fathers wrote the Pledge of Allegiance and put in the "under God" part. Her minions claim that living close to Russia makes her able to understand foreign relations. Mrs. Palin - I work for a college but it doesn't make me a professor.

5. Women will vote for her ticket because she's a woman??? My God what year is this?? 1957?

6. I hate her hair. Just had to get something catty in there.

Brain Fart of Epic Proportions

Interesting Labor Day!

We had a family day and headed for one of our favorite eateries: Cossetta's in downtown St. Paul, Minnesota. Cossetta's in just one block from the Xcel Energy Center, which is now hosting the Republican National Convention. But we both had a major brain fart and forgot. The blocked streets, police presence, and the large numbers of icky young men in suits reminded us of just who was in town. For those of you who don't know, St. Paul is a highly DEMOCRAT community and I'm proud to say the OBAMA-FRANKEN-ETC lawn signs were out in abundance.


The traffic was just too much so we headed up the hill to beautiful Grand Avenue and had the best ever lunch at Salut Bar Americain. I had the seafood crepes and we all stuffed ourselves with the best french fries I've ever eaten - or as they say pommes frites.

Then we enjoyed a lovely walk down Grand Avenue. Twin #2 and I had a spontaneous walk-in haircut while the rest enjoyed the $1 for 1-minute chair massages.

Then home to pack backpacks and fill out paperwork for tomorrow is the first day of school. I'll miss these little critters!!