There are two ways to pass a hurdle: leaping over or plowing through... There needs to be a monster truck option.
- Spontaneous kindness is to hipsters as high beams are to deer.
- The quickest way to a man's heart really is through his stomach, because then you don't have to chop through that pesky rib cage.
- Bachelor's degrees make pretty good placemats if you get 'em laminated.
- That's what college is for - getting as many bad decisions as possible out of the way before you're forced into the real world. I keep a checklist of 'em on the wall in my room.