Thursday, November 19, 2009

Sure I'm an athlete

My friend Vicki and I were discussing our lack of athletic ability the other day. We agreed it wasn't actually our LACK of ability as it was the lack of proper venues for athletes like ourselves. Here are sports where I could really make a name for myself:

Unextreme Hiking - I'm a great hiker. But only if I don't have to carry a pack, and there are plenty of benches along the route. And bathrooms. And not too many hills.

Badminton - but don't expect me to make any heroic dives

Softball - but only if I can bat. I'm a slammin' hitter. But please no base running or fielding.

Parading - I'd be wonderful in a parade, walking along waving and soaking in all the attention.

Ping-Pong - see Badminton

Power Napping - seriously don't even THINK about competing with me on this one.

Beach Biking - I like to bike on a nice flat beach. Gearing up or down is just exhausting.

Winter Walking - this covers two areas. Actually walking in the winter time, in proper attire, especially when it ends at a warm coffee shop. And walking around downtown at Northfield's Winter Walk - see last year's post.

Fishing - hey, I live in Minnesota!


Christopher Tassava said...

Blogging can be a sport if you do it over a smartphone while walking around. You could add that to the list!

Shan said...

Oh, I LOOOOOOVE this. :) You know, I'm with you. Even though as an adult I became a runner, I have zero athletic ability. I mean ZERO. I am trying my hardest to instill even a modicum of athletic interest or skill in my firstborn, who clearly has my genes. Maybe I should start coaching her in walking to coffee shops. Oh, wait! She's already really good at power napping, and about biking? Julia is totally with you. She calls a five degree incline a "hill."

Genevieve, on the other hand, is already an athlete. Have you seen her dribble a soccer ball?!

michaelg said...

Me too. *sigh*
Promise me we'll at least go for a long walk during our cookie baking extravaganza, becuase I know I'll be eating a lot of dough.

PS (PSanafter-thought) said...

I'm with you, except biking on a beach sounds REALLY HARD.

Churlita said...

I can run, bike and swim well, but I suck at any kind of team sport where I actually have to pay attention.