1. What are the callouses on my feet made from?! Titanium?! Next step is the belt sander.
2. How can a man who was tortured as a POW support torturing POW's?
3. What is that old person smell anyway?
4. Why does chocolate give me heartburn? Why can't green beans give me heartburn?
5. Why is it that my most expensive hanging basket of flowers is the first to give up the ghost?
6. Why can't I cook anything without making such a #&#^$ mess?
7. Why, when I say "put it in the refrigerator" does my husband hear "freezer"?
8. Why do I keep waking up at night?
9. What's the point of that one annoying bead of sweat that runs smack down the middle of your back? I'm ready to install a sweat band there.
10. Why can't my kids put their dirty dishes INSIDE the mostly empty dishwasher?
11. Why does my office smell of dog poo?
12. Why do I bother with makeup when it's 95 degrees outside?
13. What did I ever do to warrant such amazing friends?
14. Would my house be cleaner if I stopped blogging?
6 comments:
About #8, do you drink coffee? When I went crazy menopausal nuts a while back, one of the things I did was cut out coffee and go back to tea. I'm sleeping much more soundly these days.
1. What are the callouses on my feet made from?! Titanium?! Next step is the belt sander. Ahhhh, belt sander. Why didn't I think of that? ;)
2. How can a man who was tortured as a POW support torturing POW's? AND, he wants to do it for 100 more years!
8. Why do I keep waking up at night? Welcome to the wonderful world of menopause! :(
9. What's the point of that one annoying bead of sweat that runs smack down the middle of your back? I'm ready to install a sweat band there. Equally annoying is its twin that runs down the middle of my cleavage. :(
10. Why can't my kids put their dirty dishes INSIDE the mostly empty dishwasher? If you find the answer to this, PLEASE let me know! My hubby and son put their dishes on the counter, which is actually one step farther away than the dishwasher. There is NO logical explanation for this behavior!
14. Would my house be cleaner if I stopped blogging? My house would be cleaner, but my mental well-being would suffer. My blog-friends keep me balanced in this crazy world!
my house might be cleaner but my kids would fear for their very lives...
as far as that dishwasher thing, it drives me to drinking when Oldest Offspring asks if the dishes are clean when there is one plate covered in spaghetti sauce and a plastic sippy cup giving off sour milk stench. JUST PUT YOUR DANG DISHES IN THERE!!!!!!!!
Maybe the old person smell comes from the foot callouses? (Did I spell that right? It's too late to have to back out of the comments to check.) Get a pedicure, have them use the shaver thing, and then from that point on, every day when you shower you must rub your heels with a pumice for a short while, preferably with a heavy lotion. That seems to keep them at bay for me.
Ok, how gay is it of me to go on for a paragraph on your blog about foot callouses & pumice stones?
I'm down with you on #6 and #8.
When I say "put it in the refrigerator", my husband puts it on the counter, so you have that over me!
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