Friday, June 17, 2011

Kids! Heed my warning

This is an open letter to all those teens in a hurry to grow up.

Kids - being an adult looks like heaven, doesn't it?  You can boss the other kids around.  You can eat whatever you want.  Go to bed when you want.  Have a little card that magically pays for everything.

But here's what they don't tell you:

1. You'll spend most of your adult life on the phone with either your insurance agency or tech support for your cable company.
2. You can't eat whatever you want after all, because being an adult means you've developed heartburn.
3. Adults WANT to stay up and at least see the weather report, but we can't keep our eyes open past 9:30pm.
4. Housework - they don't mention this, or how one day you'll find yourself on your knees scraping melted bits of effluvium from the kitchen floor.  And that toilet won't clean itself!
5. All that money you get from your job?  It's already been spent on the car and household appliances.
6. If you're lucky, your acne will stick around well into middle age.
7. You gain 10lbs overnight every 6 months.

6 comments:

Tonyia said...

Long time lurker (from Northfield) but this one made me laugh so hard I HAD to comment. Love it - this is so exactly right on - thanks!

kirby said...

You forgot the one about how women will start their periods the very minute they start packing for a vacation.

Madame Leiderhosen said...

Yes. It's all true. And sometimes the acne never leave.

Anita said...

OMG, this is all true!! You can write a book for High school grads...you know something sobering, but light, ha ha!!
BTW, when are they going to start paying for us.

SkylersDad said...

tell them about car repair bills, household repair bills, and bills to repair damaged body parts from said car and house repairs.

Churlita said...

Perfect. My oldest couldn't wait to grow-up. She came back from college this Summer and told me she wasn't ready to be an adult yet. yeah. Join the club....